Another Helping of Tolle

This post features one of the quotes by Eckhart Tolle that can be in turns profoundly comforting and incredibly difficult.

Accept—then act. Whatever the present moment contains, accept it as if you had chosen it. Always work with it, not against it

Throughout  each day, and over the longer course of weeks, months, and years, we are going to encounter difficult situations. We oversleep. The car won't start. Your 3-year-old won't stop screaming. And greater tragedies like losing a job, marriage problems, and the passing of loved ones. It's inevitable in the ebb and flow of life. What Tolle suggests is a change of attitude, of perspective. And it can be very difficult. But it can also save your sanity, if not your blood pressure!

When faced with these difficulties–great and small–the tendency for many of us is to fight. And certainly we need to take action as necessary. In a very simplified analogy, if my car runs out of gas I will of course need to put more in. But it does me absolutely no good to curse the car for running out of gas, to complain about the price of gas, or to shake my fist in the air about the inconvenience of it all. See, there's a difference between solving a problem and trying to work against it.

Unfortunately, we often find ourselves in just such a situation. It's something that has hounded me most of my life. And maybe we are so set in our ways–so bull headed, as my family always said–that we have to wear ourselves out in that struggle before we can even see another way. There is really nothing we can do to change the reality of our circumstances. We can't wish it away, we can't rationalize it, we can't pretend it's not there. No ostriches with their heads in the sand.

However, we can work with each situation. Identify it for what it is. Honestly assess the components of the problem and the possible courses of action. Then choose the one that makes the most sense or that you feel best about. In our running out of gas scenario, there are probably a few options. You could flag down a motorist for help, call AAA or some other service, walk to a gas station, or knock on the door at a nearby house, for example. So weigh those options and the choose the one that seems best. Then you don't have to waste time and energy worrying about things.

If we can just attain a change in perspective, every situation becomes something we can deal with. If it's complex problem, start with at least one step that you can take. No matter how bad it is, face it head on and deal with it as it is. A related Tolle-ism is that we must learn to separate our thoughts about something from the thing itself, which is always neutral. It is as it is. Often easier said than done, for me at least. But the more I am able to emotionally detach from something "bad," the better I am able to deal with it.

Very simple, but often very daunting. Think about one of those serious issues I mentioned above. A loved one dies, one of the most difficult things we have to deal with. And, yes, we will grieve. Eventually, though, we must come to terms with it and find a way to go on. Normal looks different now. But there is no real use in wishing it hadn't happened. Shed the tears, mourn the loss–as long as it takes. But at some point, face the situation head on. Live your life. Cherish the good times you once shared, and carry on.  

It's can be like the old image of not being able to see the forest for the trees. When we're mired in at ground level, in the midst of a problem or crisis, we can see nothing but trees, trees, trees. But someone high in one of those trees, or a bird fling above them would be able to see that there is indeed an end to the forest. And if we can manage to extricate ourselves from the trees and gain that same perspective, we can find our way out as well.

And Now For Something Completely Different

We interrupt our normal schedule of visiting Eckhart Tolle to bring you this breaking news… I have signed on to stage manage The Elephant Man at the Ephrata Performing Arts Center!

I have been doing community theater since 1998 (and high school and church productions long before that!). This, however, is a new adventure for me. Previously, my involvement had been on stage. There is nothing like live theater for anyone involved in the performance arts. Our shows at EPAC typically run for eleven performances, and no two are ever exactly the same. Even if they were, the audience is always different, so the dynamic will be different for each production. And of course before opening night, there is the whole rehearsal process. It’s always been a wonder to me how the playwright’s text–which may have been in print for anywhere from a several months to (in the case of Shakespeare and other classics) hundreds of years–is given completely new life with each production. As an actor, I had always been peripherally aware of the process before casting (particularly since my wife, Joan, has stage managed many times). But my true, first-hand knowledge of the process started only with auditions. It then processed through the first read-through and then the six to eight weeks of rehearsals.

This in itself was always a beautiful process to experience. Much like a painter facing a blank canvas with only a general idea of the finished process, the company will start with the script and a ground plan of the set, as well as some general ideas for costumes, sound, and a lighting plot. Then throughout the process of several weeks, the paint will begin to color the canvas. Scenes that read one way on the printed page will receive a whole new life when staged. The stage set and properties will begin to solidify, only to be fully realized just before opening night. Those last few rehearsals will also see the final manifestation of costumes, lights, sound, and make-up.

So, here I am once again beginning this astonishing journey. And I get to experience it from a brand new perspective. As a stage manager, I work very closely with the director; and I have much more involvement with the production staff (the aforementioned properties manager and set, light, costume, and sound designers). And in the rehearsal process, the stage manager becomes very involved with the actors, a relationship that will continue throughout the performances.

This differs from most of the other production staff. On opening night, the director's work is finished, as is that of the lighting, set, and sound designers. The costume designer may have some involvement through the run, unless those duties have been handed off to assistants (there are often repairs necessary, as well as cleaning). Likewise, the props manager may need to replenish perishables or replace disposable props.

At any rate, a staged show is very much a collaborative process; each person involved must throw him- or herself fully into the endeavor. I know from conversation (and observation, I might add) that many find a spiritual component to the theatrical process. That is not to say that prayer or ritual is involved–although it may be for some! But there is at the root of the entire production an effort to somehow reach the souls of the audience. Whether a dramatic play like The Elephant Man or a light musical comedy like Legally Blonde, theater always makes that connection. For many it is a communion of sorts. The audience and the company come together to experience, to ponder, to feel, perhaps to see something truly for the first time. So it is with all true art.

So as I find a new brush at the canvas, the prospect of participating in a work that hopes to speak to those who view it is both humbling and exciting. See you on opening night!

http://www.ephrataperformingartscenter.com/index.php

Tolle Part II

As promised in my last entry, I am going to explore how we can become more aware–of ourselves, of our environment, and of others. Once again, we begin by checking in with Tolle.

It is when we are trapped in incessant streams of compulsive thinking that the universe really disintegrates for us, and we lose the ability to sense the interconnectedness of all that exists.

It may seem counter-intuitive for those of us who live in our heads most of the time. But if we really want to be in touch with ourselves and the world around us, we simply must silence our own thoughts. If you're anything like me, your tendency is to have a non-stop running commentary in your mind ALL THE TIME. Everything that occurs, everything someone (in person, on television, or online) says, every stray thought or feeling–it's all replayed and over-analyzed like a goal-line play in the Super Bowl. What did that mean? What is the hidden meaning in it? What is the subtext of that statement? What will be the eventual outcome? What do other people think of this? Is this a good thing or a bad thing?

OMG! It's no wonder that we suffer from fatigue and all manner of mental and emotional distress. I can't even keep up! And you can multiply that by several factors when it's our own actions/thoughts/words that we are evaluating. As Tolle and many mystics and contemplative types will tell us, we've got to slow down and breathe. Quiet the constant chatter.

Unfortunately, some might think, there is no real set of steps or process to this idea. (Well, I guess there is, but it's pretty simple!) It's mostly a matter of slowing down the body, mind, and spirit. There are many ways to do this. Some like to go into nature. The beach or the woods is a great place to be still. Others like to listen to Enya or some other type of new age music. The biggest thing, I suppose, is to eliminate or minimize external stimuli. I find that even soft, quiet music is too much if there are lyrics. But that's me. You may find such things helpful. Deep breathing exercises are especially helpful as well. Pay attention to breathing in, breathing out. Notice your lungs and chest expand and contract. And some choose to use some meditative or other repetitive words (the classic om). Try not to have any real thoughts. Empty your mind as best you can. The idea is to free yourself from the tyranny of your thoughts, not to entertain them. And don't worry if you fall asleep. Your mind or your body might need that. Chances are that it might be a very restful nap. We can all use those most of the time!

It's helpful to repeat this exercise periodically. Once you start to become familiar with the feeling of turning off your mind, it gets easier. And you can go through parts of your day like this. Especially something repetitive or menial. Try turning off the music and driving to work with a quiet mind. It's amazing how you can start your day more relaxed! Gardening, doing the dishes, cooking (as long as the recipe isn't too complex!), and other chores are great, too.

If you're not in the habit of quieting your mind, it'll seem weird at first. You'll probably feel self-conscious and uncomfortable. That's okay. Stick with it. And if it's something that you've done before but got away from (like me from time to time), it'll feel like a sort of homecoming. Don't beat yourself up over lapsing. It happens to all of us. But every time we come home, it's refreshing and recharging. There's enough noise going on in the world these days; let's at least quiet our own piece of it.

Mystic Rhythms 2.0

Okay, so it's been over a year since I last posted anything here. Honestly, after a while I kind of forgot about it! But then a dear friend (you know who you are!) asked me about it and mentioned missing it. So here goes . . .

But what to write? SO much has happened in the last 15 months–globally (still [mostly] lovin' Pope Francis!), nationally (lots to say about that, but another time), and personally (funny how at almost-50 I'm still learning who I am).

So I thought maybe to kick off Version 2.0 of this blog I'd take a look at one of the most meaningful and grounding sources I know: Eckhart Tolle.

Tolle has been foundational in my spiritual walk, as I know he has been for millions. And, no, I did not first encounter him on Oprah! Tolle, according to a 2009 New York Times article, is "not identified with any religion, but uses teachings from Zen Buddhism, Sufism, Hinduism and the Bible." So he can speak to people of any faith or of no particular faith at all. One requirement in gaining anything at all from Tolle is to disengage the critical thought process of the intellect (although on one level his teachings make a whole lot of sense) and to allow your spirit and your soul to engage these ideas. This holds true for all honest contemplative work, which is why non-dual thinkers from all faiths or none find resonance in his writing.

So several years ago I was feeling spiritually restless in my Christian walk. The traditional (and by that I mean mainline American Evangelical) theology and practice had gradually but persistently soured for me. I finally was able to tap into some more mystical and less dogmatic writing and teaching, and I eventually became convinced that the old-school Christian way was not the only way. (I know, some of the more staunch "believers" are either shuddering or have already tuned my out; I'm okay with that.) This was definitely a period of awakening for me. I began to see the depth and wisdom of less establishment flavors of my own faith as well as other faith traditions. And I am not discounting atheism either, but I would think there must be at least some sort of spiritual or transcendent aspect to one's life to live fully.

Anyway, back to Tolle. With an open an honest heart and spirit, I think most can find truths both simple and profound in his teachings. And I know they're not for everyone, and that's fine. But I find myself returning to many of Tolle's sayings when I feel out of balance, like a wheel that's off center and is just not turning freely. So my intention is to share some of my favorites and perhaps expound or just take a look at how they apply. This first time I'm sharing one of the simplest and yet most helpful.

Awareness is the greatest agent for change.

To me the key to this thought is that first word. Unless we are truly aware–of our surroundings, others, and mostly ourselves–we are incapable of true and lasting change. How often do we careen through life, perhaps railing against this or that, demanding that things change. (Picture Lucy Van Pelt with her fist in the air yelling at the world!) But how often do we truly see things as they are? And certainly we must ask this question first and foremost of ourselves. Do we truly understand why we did or didn't do something? Or why some external stimulus has such an effect on us? But we must also look more honestly at others and at the world around us. Do we have all the facts, or just the first level of information, which may or may not be true at all? And even if we do know all or most of the "information," we may be completely oblivious to how those facts affect another or how someone else interprets or reacts to them. Going back to my own Christian background, Jesus cautioned "Judge not that you be not judged," and " How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when there is the log in your own eye?"

Yes, there are things in the world and in ourselves that need to be changed. And I would say we usually don't fully understand any of them. So let's work on getting those logs out of our eyes. How, you ask? Must leave something for the next post!